It reminded me of this great video someone put together that answered the burning question: what if 4Kids had licensed Higurashi no Naku Koro ni?
So, I came up with this list of other shows 4Kids could dub, in an amusingly horrible fashion of course.
5) Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei - This show is already licensed, but I'd love to see the 4Kids execs figure out how to crop out the constant references to suicide even in just the first episode. Maybe Itoshiki-sensei would have a remarkable love for really big pearl necklaces to cover up his noose, for example. They would also restructure the series so that Kafka would be the main character, and her insane optimism would no longer be ironic or amusing.
4) Sora no Otoshimono - Those aren't REALLY flying panties, they're paper airplanes! Oh...wait...
3) Kuroshitsuji - Any reference to Sebastian being an actual demon will be excised in favor of him being a "doyen" (it means "expert"), and the episodes will be cut to focus primarily on the wacky hijinks of the three idiot servants and whatever other secondary characters pop up. Ciel's wacky right eye and eyepatch are explained by a tragic, but curable!, disease.
2) Soul Eater - The "Shinigami" school becomes a Nerf battle school, so instead of transforming into a scythe, Soul Eater-- whose name will be "Peter," but he's so cool that everyone calls him "Soul Peter" --transforms into a Nerf scythe. Heehee. Nerf. The Thompson twins would transform into marshmallow guns, and Tsubaki is totally nerf nunchuks.
1) Durarara!! - I just imagine them 'shopping some kind of head onto Celty, for fear that the show would be "too violent" for the kiddies. And in the scene in the first episode where Celty beats a few guys into the ground with her motorcycle that's actually a horse? Think: My Little Pony.
Okay, kids, share: what shows do you think it'd be funny for 4Kids to license...and which ones are you hoping to god they don't? (I sort of fear for my Shugo Chara!...)