Nice post, Revolution, but I think you've got Instrumentality completely wrong.
As far as we can tell, Instrumentality's exactly what it says on the tin: Everybody's barriers are removed, and now their souls are one. It's not really 6 billion people watching TV so much as 6 billion people sharing a psychic link, their thoughts and feelings flowing freely and without reserve or fear.
As for the "How disgusting" remark, you'll notice that she says it right after touching Shinji lovingly on the cheek. This brings us to the "hedgehog's dilemma" from earlier in the series. Shinji and Asuka have chosen to face life, but what that means is that they now have to FACE LIFE. They've shut themselves out of Instrumentality, and so they're left with alienation and the fear of getting hurt, back where they began, but stronger and probably wiser.